Rachael Reflecting...

Hey guys. My name is Rachael Anduze. Yes, I spell my name with an extra A.

I'm a college student, and I created my tumblr just to write and clear my head as best I can. It seems to be working well for the time being. I'm pursuing a degree in music (vocal performance). I'm a singer from Sunny San Diego. Christian. (Relationship, not religion.) Die hard Chargers fan. I babysit all the time, and I'm an intern for an event/wedding planning business called Events by Elisa. I'm also currently a back ground singer in a band called LPSEVEN.



Thanks for reading! Take care and God Bless! :)

comparison.

I think it’s safe to say that we’ve all dealt with some sort of comparison in our life—whether it’s something as simple as putting two shirts side by side and seeing which one is the better fit, or comparing yourself to a celebrity or someone you admire, we compare things all the time. Comparing is a nice tool we can use to eliminate an option so we can make a final decision, but it can also be a very bad thing, or so I found out this past week. 

I won’t go into detail about my birth mother here, but obviously, I’m not living with her for a reason. So if you don’t know me, go ahead and let your imagination run free. But with every child comes a mother, and father. My father is no better than my mother. He basically told me, in a nutshell, that I am my mother’s child. And I quote from a lengthy email I received from him… 

“You learned from your mother because she always put things off and delayed,
especially when bills needed to be paid. I can’t blame you too much because that is what
you learned. I don’t mean to insult you by comparing you to your mother in that respect but she was your poor role model.”
 I don’t think very highly of myself…anyone that knows me well will tell you that. I think I’m a little on the heavy side, I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed, and I’m a dork. But one thing I know for certain: I am NOT my mother’s child. I will not be compared to the evil person that she is. I will be better than she is, and I will be a damn good mother. Yes, I’m not perfect. But I will never, ever be in her likeness at all. I’m not a selfish person, but I deserve better than that. 

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